5 steps to conflict resolution

If you and a coworker need to settle a disagreement, the Conflict Resolution Network advises you to avoid the desire to blame and to seek to improve the relationship.

"The most important win/win maneuver you can make is to change course by beginning to discuss underlying needs, rather than only looking at solutions...Addressing each person's underlying needs means you build solutions that acknowledge and value those needs, rather than denying them."

"To probe below the surface requires redirecting the energy. Ask questions like

• "Why does that seem to be the best solution to you?"
• "What's your real need here?"
• "What's the outcome or result you want?"

So how can both you and your coworker win in a disagreement?

1. Be willing to fix the problem.
2. Listen to what the problem is for them.
3. Say what the problem is for you.
4. Attack the problem, not the person.
5. Look for answers so everyone gets what they need.

(Related article: 5 rules for negotiating anything.)